Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
