come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
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