Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
