well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
