We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
I came so hard my ears popped.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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