i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize