omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Randomize