Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(805): View more from California

It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"

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(707): View more from California

she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.

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(519): View more from Ontario

I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.

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(947): View more from Michigan

He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me

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(334): View more from Alabama

I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.

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