I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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