no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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