no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
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In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
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We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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