i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Randomize