My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Come share oat with me in your robe
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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