I think my fart just growled at me.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Randomize
