I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
