why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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