She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Randomize