We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
