it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
