I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
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