Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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