I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
