I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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