she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
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