i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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