she was so not down for the gang bang
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
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