Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
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