Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
i just had sex bonerless
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Randomize
