This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize