I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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