I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
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