found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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