wake up i wanna do it froggy style
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
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Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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