saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Randomize
