hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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