I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
The power of my boobs compel you
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Randomize
