You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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