At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
