She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
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