why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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