You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
