she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
