I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Your shirt... Was in my pants
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
