I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Randomize
