you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
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