normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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