sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Randomize
