you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Randomize
