bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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