Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Randomize
